Some people sleep better at night when they have louboutin shoes in their closet. I sleep better when I know I have okporoko in my fridge and a bagco super sack bag in my cabinet.
I’ve been dancing azonto ever since I got this ukwa (not sure about the spelling). Be jealous. Be very jealous. It doesn't get any fresher than this. This one is straight from the unpaved streets of my village. No refrigeration, no preservatives. From street hawker, to box, to plane, to yankee, to my stomach. When I placed the first handful in my mouth, it was like I won the mega millions lottery. Ukwa was among the few things that I looked forward to whenever we went to the village. The Lagos one never tasted as good as the village one.
There are some things that black people should just not do. For instance, we do not have the privilege of running around a bank at any moment without people looking at us suspiciously. I and BLG made that mistake this week. We both went to the bank a few minutes before it closed. On second thought, we decided to use the ATMS outside the building, rather than go inside. We each went to different ATMs, and we finished our transactions at about the same time. When BLG realized this, she decided to run ahead to the car, so that she could claim to be faster than me. I, on the other hand, was not going to let her claim this title of faster-working person, so I decided to run as well (immature, I know. But it’s one of the few immature things that BLG makes me do. Never blame those mommies of babies and toddlers who speak with babytalk to everyone. These kids have a way of taking over your life without your permission. Soon you find yourself doing things you never thought you would ever do). When we reached the car, we both realized that the scene we had created was a dangerous one. Two black people in hoodies running from the bank, it’s by God’s grace that we weren’t shot and olopa wasn’t called. I’m not ridiculous. Remember that Harvard professor that was arrested for trying to get into his own house, and what about Trayvon Martins. We can’t be too careful as black people, especially when we’re around paranoid, subliminally racist, white people in the suburbs.
Google has been so annoying recently. She’s been displaying homophobic behavior. The other day, she randomly repeatedly shouted “all homosexuals will go to hell.” We went on to have a huge argument about the statement. I wasn’t being defensive; I didn’t appreciate the way she was cherry picking the Bible. Why didn't she talk about the adulterers, liars, and other sinners listed in that Bible passage? Then another day, out of nowhere, she again started quoting the Leviticus scripture that says no man shall lay with a man. Then yesterday, out of randomville, she came to me and was like, “hmm… I think I now understand how people are born gay.” She went on to explain nothing new in a very annoying voice.
On another note, I'm still trying to walk the straight path :). I flirted with a guy who was twice arrested for gun possession and robbery. I like bad boys. Not! The flirting occurred at the instruction of my friend-- peer pressure. We were hanging out, and then we meet the guy. He had all the shallow things people check when they first meet someone, plus he's educated, works a good job, and articulate. When he started talking to me, my friend decided to bounce; however, before she left, she instructed me to flirt with him. She's a childhood friend who has been trying to get me straight, so I didn't want to let her down that day. I decided to persevere and talk to the dude despite his checkered past, which she was unaware of. (The things this dude said, chai. I had to wash my ears with hand sanitizer, soap, and water when I got home.) My friend kept checking in with her eyes from across the room. And whenever I wasn't doing enough for her liking, she would signal it. Whenever I flirted, she winked or gave me a thumbs up. Long story short, I continued to flirt with the guy to make my friend happy. I later discovered from another friend who works with the guy that he has been unable to completely put his criminal past behind him. He has discussed his wishes to abandon his normal great life in order to sell drugs and even rob banks. #Nawasha
Well, I'm still hanging in there. It's not fun at all. Despite the difficulty, I hope to make it work. Here are two "testimonies" of lesbians who were "converted." Unfortunately, I don't believe they've been delivered. They are only going through the asexual phase I went through when I got born again in college. I've shared my story of how I asked the Lord to take away my homosexuality when I was saved, and how I believed I was delivered when I became asexual. But then out of no where, this thing came back again. So I now believe that the sign of someone who has been delivered is that they would be effortlessly attracted to the opposite sex, until then, forget it. Sadly, these women may soon realize the homo in them is only lurking around the corner.
Alright, have a great Easter